PERFECT ME…

thinking

I am so perfect, in fact I have never and will never see anybody as perfect as me.

When I make a mistake; I’m only human, when others make a mistake; they are careless,

When I fail a course; the lecturer failed me, when others fail a course; they are dull,

When I eat all d food; I’m hungry, when others eat all the food; they are greedy,

When I come to church late; I was busy, when others come to church late; they don’t fear God,

When I win; I am obviously the best, when others win; they are lucky,

When I shout angrily; they provoked me, when others shout angrily; they have no self control,

When I fall asleep; I was tired, when others fall asleep; they are lazy,

When I drink garri; I’m being content, when others drink garri; they are broke & poor.

When I play games; I’m relaxing, when others play games; they are wasting their time.

Can’t you see how perfect  I am & flaw full everyone else, that’s why I have a right to criticize everyone ( and maybe even God)

Perfect me … Or …is that, insensitive & judgmental me.

William Udousoro 

AN UNMASKED FOE

beat
Watch out comrades! I cried in a loud shrill,
Clinching in alarm as everything came to a still
Comrades catapulted into throes of battle,
Ready to settle a score with an enemy
But alas, into d garland of fools we marched
And no one was found in sight.
Like a bad dream, day diffused into a terrific night.
Weapons clashed, glittering tears as we soared in a castle of fear.
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CHRISTMAS SPECIAL – WHO IS JESUS TO ME

Who is Jesus to me you ask? Kind of a funny question. Of course I know its serious but what kind of answer would be appropriate, would contain all my heart longs to say. I know it’s ambiguous but first of all I would like to say WOW. Funny right, I get the fact that I can’t simply say in a word or two who Jesus is to me or how much He means to me but is it because I’m at a lack of proper words to use or is it because I don’t really know what to say, maybe I don’t really know who He is. Puzzling…
Okay let me try again. Jesus, this Jesus is the man I’ve read about in the bible, a hero prophesied about, waited for and didn’t show up in the Old Testament. He in the fulfillment of time as the bible says showed up in the New Testament, a marvel indeed. Although kinda weird to the people of that time, He altered the course of the world before, present and even defied the laws science would one day present. His fame spread far and wide and though He led quite a short yet eventful life, His teachings and Spirit, His miracles and lifestyle has left the world a totally different place. He is the same one known to be the SON OF GOD; but wait that’s not who He is to me. Those are just some truths you already may have come to know.
Just as the world is carefully divided into seven continents, nations spread far and wide, thousands of towns and cities with millions of languages similar and the different and amazingly billions of characters, individualities and yes opinions of whom Jesus is.. but you see I can’t speak for all these people whether saved or not see Jesus but I can speak for myself, I can say how I feel, what I think, the truth I’m sure I know and though ambiguous I still think is impendent I figure out, you figure out who this Jesus is to you.
You see Jesus is the voice that spoke to me when I went wrong as a boy. Jesus was the one who consoled me when no one knew deep down I was hurting. Jesus was the one who drew me to His word as a little boy, teaching and tailoring my life into His masterpiece. Jesus was the one who called out to me every Sunday morning relentlessly until my heart answered to a call to love, light and life. Jesus was the one who had me saved and had to watch while I nailed Him time and again to the cross. Jesus was the one who wept in my insides when I opened my eyes to pornography, to lust, till the very reason my soul could find no peace in God. Jesus, this same Jesus is the one who forgave me all my sins in His mercy but had to repeat the process over and over again because I wouldn’t just stand firm in the victory he had won for me. Yet He kept forgiving me even pleaded my cause at the father’s feet. When my heart was lost in darkness and my conscience sealed as if forever, Jesus was the voice that called out to me still, renewing my once lost love, reinstating me, giving me a life testimony no, a love testimony. all my life I’ve known Him to be my healer cos though He does heal my body, the healing He provides my soul as He does so many others is so sure its value remains eternal. He healed my heart so well that I think it’s new. well it has to be cause though I should feel hurt, I feel joy and where resentment should abide in abundance I find acceptance, I find love, I find Him yes I find Jesus there.
This Jesus is the one who taught me to be strong, to be a man, not the kind that had to be proved with every passing minute NO! He taught me to be a man confident and assured, a man who knows that responsibility is his to bear man without fear but with courage on nothing but the living and true God. This same Jesus was the one who taught me to respect the woman even as He does the Church. so I don’t stay away but just close enough to be a friend and as at when due a lover, a companion, a husband.
I’ve said quite much but permit me to say, this Jesus was the one who saw me in my room alone masturbating, hopelessly loosing the joy of my salvation but he didn’t leave in disgust. He stayed there to caution me, close enough to forgive me when I cried out. This same Jesus saw me struggling and He called His servants together, rallied around to raise an army just for my sake, so that I may still see He loves me and would save me at any cost. This same Jesus rejoiced with me when I came to the realization of the fact that of a truth it is not by works but surprisingly by His own mercy cos He lived, He died, He conquered sin for my sake so I would never struggle cos he knew if I did I would fail. He freed me even before I was born and on that dark September night when I realized this, He smiled with me rejoiced with me for I was once lost but now am found.
You see, this Jesus will be the one I would see when it’s all been said and done. He will stand there and speak for me before the father; He would comfort me of all the wounds and scars the world had to offer. He would love me and forever keep me at His side in His love and light.
Now about the question you asked here’s a clue about what I think of Jesus or as you say ‘who He is to me’. Jesus is my love, my saviour, my inspiration, my God. He is the reason I sing, I live. He is the life in me that makes me smile. He is so many things to me and here’s some more, just kidding. But seriously if I were to use a sentence to say who Jesus is to me, I would say He is my love and He lives inside of me.
by
Ezeonyeka Godswill