Dear God #2

To follow you
Anywhere
Anytime
Anyhow

2

I’m on a boat sailing to the shore where you are
The waters, still, remind me of your love –
Unwavering and completely overwhelmimg
When I’m stuck and can’t go any further, you still believe in me
I’m sorry for not trusting you enough
For not doing the little crazy things you want to me to do
For not completely giving in to your desires
I’ll listen to those little nudges inside and obey your voice
I am not going to hide the light that you have put in me
You know what you’re doing
You know what’s best for me
From now on, I put all of my faith and all of my trust in you
I see your hands stretched out to me
I love how warm and safe it feels
I don’t want to ever be in a place where you aren’t
I want to follow your lead

Your darling

– Ifiokabasi Okop (2019)

Dear God #1

Eyes that see
Ears that hear
A heart that knows
A life that does

1

I’m stuck
I don’t know how to describe it
I feel numb and distant from you
I searched for answers in a world that proffers lies
I’m sorry I didn’t trust you
I’m sorry I doubted you
Distance from you is seeping life out of me
I look for meaning and reasons to live
Dad, it’s vague, dark, empty and I’m loosing myself
Please show me
Give me eyes that see you in everything
Ears that hear your reassuring, soothing words
A heart that knows you, all of you
Let my life do your desires, be your heartbeat, live your life
Your Zoe

Your lost daughter

– Ifiokabasi Okop (2019)

RESCUE

I found rags to cover up
I take the lonely road home
Trying to hold back tears
– Mum will be so angry –
I’m at the front door
And I can’t ring the doorbell
The door clicks open and Mum gasps
– What happened? –
– I don’t know –
I sob and drop to my knees
– Don’t worry honey, let me clean you up –
She picks me up and takes
Me to her bathroom, peels
The rags off me, picks out
The dying petals from my hair
And cleans off the ashes from
My body. She gently sponges
Me and shampoos my hair
I let out the tears
– I’m so sorry Mum –
– It’s okay honey, you’ll be fine –
I nod
– I love you, you know that right? –
I nod
When she is done, I look at
The bathroom mirror and touch
My face. I see the glow come into
My eyes, I smile and clean off my tears
– I love you –

IfiokAbasi Okop
© 2019

FADE

Spotlight’s on me
I look around
Hoping these eyes
Aren’t staring at me
Suddenly the dress
Mum picked out
Doesn’t feel that
Glamorous anymore
The flowers in my hair
Are falling off, dying
The petals crumble
Colours; white, gold, purple
Slowly fading
No one’s staring anymore
I’m forgotten
But the spotlight’s still on me
I run but the light follows me
I stop and scream
– Let me go! –
I hold up the dress but
It’s in flames
From the hem up,
It turns to ashes
I run into the bathroom
– This is a nightmare –

IfiokAbasi Okop
© 2019

HOPE

I walk into Mum’s room
She has laid out
Another beautiful dress
For me with flowers for
My hair.
– You don’t need a dress to make
You feel beautiful. You are beautiful,
Loved and blessed and that’s something
You have to know, for yourself.
No matter how many times you feel alone
And forgotten, don’t forget to come to my
Front door, this is always Home –

The smile on my face bursts into a beautiful
radiance; the joy of a thousand hearts.

IfiokAbasi Okop
© 2019

FADE

Spotlight’s on me
I look around
Hoping these eyes
Aren’t staring at me
Suddenly the dress
Mum picked out
Doesn’t feel that
Glamorous anymore
The flowers in my hair
Are falling off, dying
The petals crumble
Colors; white, gold, purple
Slowly fading
No one’s staring anymore
I’m forgotten
But the spotlight’s still on me
I run but the light follows me
I stop and scream
– Let me go! –
I hold up the dress but
It’s in flames
From the hem up,
It turns to ashes
I run into the bathroom
– This is a nightmare –

IfiokAbasi Okop
© 2019