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I have really wise friends
I have really smart friends
And then I have these other friends. These ones I don’t know how to classify them.
For when you hear their thought process, you will wonder if this part of the body called a brain is vestigial in some animals.
When they utter words, you automatically want an occupation with hammers for every thing they say make you want to break their head.
But then I got to thinking;
200 years from now and these same ‘not so senseless’, poor in making decisions, and utterly tiring friends of mine would be known as ‘the ancestors’
A status men will begin to idolize.
I see us use a whole lot of our mind’s compartment to believe things that were told to us by people who couldn’t figure out simple things, I mean, some of the very learned of them actually argued that the earth was flat, like a table.
I am not even talking about the unlearned ones from your villages that birthed those you now call grandpa. Just imagine it.
They told you to pour drinks on the floor for the ancestors and you agree, well it’s *Omenala, so it can’t be broken.
They said a woman should be shorn when her husband dies and well, who are we to not obey the voices of ignorance passed down to us?
We carry knowledge like tentacles on a snail’s head but still slip back into the cave of ignorance we use to shell whatever good we can make of life, just because we have been told to ‘stand on the wisdom of the elders’,
Now guess who said that? ‘THE ELDERS’
I feel this is rigged.
Then our faith, love, strength, and even humanity is subject to a broken past called tradition,
Something that might have been suggested by a ‘not so smart’ old man who was only opportune to live before us.
So I take a stand today.
I will relate with the rules of the ancestors like they were still alive now
I will weigh their wisdom based on how wise it is, NOW!
I will not waste my time in their myth, only to satisfy their dead bones long gone with the sands of time.
I will make decisions now and then advice younger generations to learn from my words, but before I go from this earth;
I will let them know I wasn’t the wisest
I wasn’t the smartest
I was as man as man can be
And most of all;
As they grow, and find better ways to do what I said couldn’t be done,
They shouldn’t be afraid to discard my letters and fly the plane of their imaginations to outer space and back.
For no matter how sacred we decide to treat the scrolls of heroes past,
And bend always to their judgments on matters, using them as the ultimate yardstick to measure life.
I dare say that many of them were also as confused as we are at some points of important decisions,
And to crown it all, some chose wrongly.
Which only goes to say that we with them were all normal humans.
And if I won’t let another man dictate what I do and decide I run my life, I’m including the great ancestors too.
*Omenala is the Igbo(Nigerian Language) word that means tradition
It was clear that I wasn’t full of anything
But everyone could bet that I was full of myself.
You would think I would weigh a thousand tons when the contents of me were turned into a bag and placed on a weight but I am that feather
By every wind of doctrine.
See, I had seen suits;
Seasons 1 to 5, and 6, and 7,
Nothing in the whole seasons of life could suit to cover the empty shell I hid in the well pressed excuse of the suit I wore. ME.
The real me;
Who knew nothing. Just occasional passages from the bible I could jump on, and like a frog; hip-hop on from time to time just to prove that I haven’t been listening to the ‘devil’s music’ and so I dress to kill, looking ‘smart’ on Sundays, my proof that I was scent enough. And I was worthy enough to lift up holy hands with. The cufflinks of doubts connecting my wrist to my chest.
I was unworthy! And I knew it!
I knew it, because whenever I saw people dig in the corners of new buildings around my house I saw something I would never be; WELL.
I felt alone in the world
I knew what I had wasn’t enough
I even told friends I needed space for it felt more natural to the man I was
We all did church, but when I checked how far I had come with what I called the gospel,
I knew it was useless
You are saved by him,
But you are condemned,
Unless you save yourself.
But that was before his light came
The light came
Delight came when his light came
It tasted sweet but I wept;
oxymoron like sugarcane
I got to know how good I was
I got to know who he was
And he told me who I was;
Till then I had always felt I knew so much
But the fool in me was revealed when the wise in him chose a foolish way to change the full in me.
I emptied myself and took him in
And till now,
I’m still intoxicated by the love he gave.
I can now brag about being full
And I don’t need to be full of myself to do it.
It was the first time I learnt, that the first ‘useless’ letter of him, could arrest the empty space in me and make me ‘W’hole.
This is a story about a girl in her twenties and a guy in his twenties; late.
On a date when every other person walked into the mall hands in hands and shoulders;
Their fates already sealed by the late mr Kori and little Miss Kate.
So I know, and you know that he would be leaving this evening with a no,
And she would have dodged another bullet of a man sent to rent what’s left of the tattered clothing of her shadowed past,
Park into her heart with no rent.
Brothers and sisters, you relate with this right?
How often do we already decide what he intends, from the last person we met who was from the same tribe?
Has the same look, with a similar beard, same complexion, from the same country;
How we now act like everyone with the same ‘dark’ name plays the same bad game has left me wondering;
If this field will ever be fair.
I mean, long before I came along your path someone, somewhere already did my name a smear, so all I do with whatever I do, or do not, would be to remind you of him, how awful?
And when you can’t seem to box me you still find a box to box me, your low blow finds a way to make ‘all men, all women, the same’
Just because we all carry the Y chromosome doesn’t make us the same with your EX, the same way your X doesn’t make you miss Kate,
Our meeting was not a mistake.
I am not Mr. Kori.
I wouldn’t choose quick seconds over the trust you give;
I wouldn’t love you and leave;
Or maybe I would, but please
Let me not pay for what he did.
And don’t let him pay for what I did,
And if you can do this for me, I promise to hold up my own end of this bargain, and not think you only came for the money,
not let you pay for all she did.
No I’m not saying ‘snap out of it’, I know you still hurt, you are human so you should feel;
but let’s consciously drink from these bars tendered to heal;
And in a short while from now,
A little walk from this bar; we would have drunk to fill.
For only then would we walk into the mall, hands in hand,
And maybe, I would be fortunate enough to get a ‘Yes’ by the end of the night, this time from the real you, on this date, the day we finally let go.
Let’s face it,
Nobody is really real with all the weight;
So we can lose the hate, and plan to love again, today.
As I stood at the bus-stop waiting for a vehicle, a lady with shaved head approached me and smiled. I smiled back and returned my gaze to the direction I was expecting a lift to come from. On turning around, the lady was still smiling at me. This time, I raised one of my brows in a fashion that indicated I was asking non verbally if I could help her. Her smile broadened even more. Getting a little uncomfortable with the weirdness I shifted further away from her but she followed suit. I then decided to ask her, ‘can I help you?’. Her face turned red immediately. She broke down on her knees in tears. Before I could figure out how to react to this sudden outburst of emotion, a man came from behind and spoke in low comforting tones to her, massaging her shoulders. He pulled her up, looked at me and apologized for her behavior. I asked him if she was alright and he said his wife was going to be fine one day. On probing further I learnt that the first time she behaved in an abnormal way was a month ago when she beat their 2 years old daughter and ran out of the house half naked. She was chased and brought back to the house with the effort of at least five men. She was abnormally stronger than a woman can be. Since then it has been from one weird behavior to another. They had been to psychiatrists and after series of experiments and tests, the doctors couldn’t diagnose exactly what was wrong with her nor a cure. They only gave her pills for sedation.
Now the man was close to tears and I asked him if I could pray for his wife, he said he didn’t mind. I laid my hands on her and commanded any insanity spirit in operation in her to leave. She started laughing. I spoke in tongues for some minutes and commanded the spirit again to flee in Jesus name. The lady started sobbing, then turned to her husband and in her sobs she was muttering, ‘i’m sorry. It happened again’. I told her it won’t happen again. I collected her husband’s number to keep track of her. For 6 months I called atleast 8 times to check on her and she never had any other attack nor crisis.
As I finished the testimony and believers were screaming ‘glory’, a man told me it’s all in my head. I asked what he meant and he said it’s very much possible that the series of drugs administered to the lady started taking effect then. I laughed and told him it was hilarious it waited till I prayed for her. We left it at that.
Yet in another cell meeting I had another testimony. In my work place it was a struggle who got promoted and who got increment of salary. Staff used everything within their disposal to fight for higher positions. They lied against each other and set traps for their colleagues. Amongst the staff with the same qualifications as me, an interview was to be held for the position of the head of our department. We went for the interview on the scheduled date and at the end of the interview I was congratulated as the new HOD of my department. As I was swerving in my new seat in my office overlooking the roads through a fine glass, one of those colleagues I took interview with came in and asked me who I was and what I did. I was confused and asked for an explanation. She said she drugged my drink the morning of the interview with a strong sleeping pill and watched me drown it yet I didn’t bate my eyes. All I could say was ‘wow’. I was shocked and yet amazed. Turned out I was impervious to poison.
The same man from the last cell meeting stood again amidst the joy and said ‘it’s all in your head’. He said body systems react at different degrees to soporific drugs. I told the man that ordinary tea in the morning make me drowsy not to mention strong sleeping pills. I’m a believer and things like neutralizing poisons are in my nature.
Then comes the most recent one which I look forward to testifying about. My nephews that were left in my care fell seriously ill at the same time. They were throwing up and running high temperature. Imagine the fear that grabbed me. Their temperature was so hot, it was impossible to hold them for long. I hugged them tightly and prayed in tears like I had never before. It happened through the night and I spoke in tongues through the night. By the early hours of the morning, tiredness defeated me and I slept. Some time later I was woken by stamps on the bed and on opening my eyes, it’s tiny feets jumping on the bed. Hallelujah!
So of course the man would tell me ‘it’s all in your head’, giving me another feeble reason why it’s all in my head!
But glory!!! Let it get into believers’ head and be not only in our heads but also in our bodies and minds that we have power to cast out demons, heal the sick, speak in new tongues and be neutral to poisons. Let it be all in our heads that everything has been put under our charge. It’s all in my head and it works!!!
It came in a flash like some Allen knew exactly what was on my mind.
In the midst of 2 strangers in a BRT bus, one looked like another normal guy, and the other like a boss.
*Lagos my location, but I had thoughts in heaven.
So I felt heaven on earth, well that’s what you get for being in Him.
Have you ever wondered how lovely it would be to spend a whole day without bad mouthing anything, anywhere or even anyone?
Bastard; playfully said
Fool; with a lovely pat on the head
‘You will never amount to anything’ from a mother to a child and perhaps;
No pastor would lead a congregation of well meaning followers to a battle ground that makes a post of ‘deaths to whoever’ and then tag God in prayers like he was a supporting cast in this horror movie on a steady loop in their mind.
But they don’t see it,
We don’t see it,
I mean how black can a heart get before truth can no longer wash it?
I wish we can all set a day apart;
A day when we will all agree to rather trade punches than hurt with our words
A day when we will be focused enough to not let any slippery dark word go unapologized.
A day when we stop using these black knights to bat men, but rather;
Step into the light and use white to bathe them.
A day, when we master love
Then We try a week,
Then a month;
And soon it becomes abnormal and weigh a thousand tons on our lips whenever we try to muster the courage to plant a word that will grow into a scary tree from these our mustard seeds.
So I decide daily, surely, purposely;
I choose to believe differently
To fight differently
To speak differently
And actually stop playing the devil’s hate game with him.
Since we are buddies, let me play a little with God;
For I am in Him
And He is in me
Heaven in *Lagos;
I will be that one drop of oil that will float above stormy waters.
I will fight alongside anyone I can, till my heart goes silent with its beats.
It’s who I am, it’s what I give,
*Lagos is a major city in Nigeria.
Returning to our root is the most important journey of life. The place where we carefully look inward daily and receive a permanent change, a change that can only come from the most sincere core of our being.
We all must seek to know God, the one who makes things work without human consent, without our permission.
Our Divine Centre the source of all creation whose existence and faithfulness cannot easily be denied.
The importance of this turning in, far supercedes our knowledge ( gnosis) of right and wrong, good and evil, history and name calling, revelations of men and sojourners of relative truths, For all these things are but factors in our pursuit merely because of the human senses. What we see, feel, smell, taste or perceive to be ideal.
But consider a man born deaf, blind and mute with no feeling on his fingertips, a man locked out of this physical world, in it, yet devoid of its infiltration, shall he too not have the privilege of finding His Maker within? Surely God is not unjust, for such a man will find Yahweh without ever having to rely on definitions of society, culture, assertions and self.
For Adonai is NOT Religion.
The real life is the one within. The one unseen. Where such a man though he be in the world finds he is locked out from it, he will become subject to the real life he sees and in it he would either find Perfect peace, or turmoil and disease. For God is not unjust, HE will never take a man for Himself devoid of Shuv ( A conscious choice. a turn/ answer to the call of His Love).
To dwell on the frailty of this existence, savouring its empty promises and hoping in vain glory is to remain subject to the human senses. Like the four elements of the earth are strong but without the fifth, their true potential can never be realised, so also the answer to Yahwehs inward call is for one reason alone, a journey to know the fifth. A journey to know Grace.
Grace to grow, grace to love, grace to continually shun outward circumstances and believe.
To find Him, this pearl of great price is where death ends and life for man begins. But it all starts with a searching soul,
As the deer pants for the water, the soul must lung for Him.
For desire, a burning hunger that cannot be satisfied with anything but Him is the beginning of the journey.
Never the less, in the physical realm, the soul must constantly set its lungings on the eternal, for only spirit with spirit can meet.
True desire begets surrender
No sooner than when the soul hungers and thirsts after righteousness from the very depths within ( Christ the living spring) , he begins to see that there is so much more he can do without.
There is a powerful pull within, a gnawing for oneness, an intercourse with Divinity Himself. The purest of Depths calling to depth.
Surrender will beget power. The three fold chord of the Divine that cannot be broken for all eternity. There is power in the alignment of Spirit, Soul and Body. Only He is Spirit. He is the life of man.
This is the salvation of man.
Not his ability to enter realms beyond his five senses, but the privilege of recognising true Light.
From here onward to eternity, omnipotence takes over, causing fruitful multiplication of true Light!
He shall bring forth sons (epignosis), not only in His Image but after His Likeness.
And the Truth of His Light will arise and do what Light does best. Shine!