INTIMACY OF TRUTH

He asks why I shrink
My mind conjures letters into words
Envelopes but unable to post it
The inefficiency of the post office may misplace it
Misplace it with reactions from cross-purposes
For avoidable protocol of tracing words to letters I shrink

He says I should try him
But I know the end from the beginning
I am expected to be saintly
With perhaps a pardonable trace of sinfulness
Because he supposedly understands I’m human
I can’t determine which of my sinfulness he considers pardonable
So I don’t try him

I quiver at my imaginations
My mind is a roller coaster of horror
The gate of Hades
For his safety, there is no access
No actual intimacy
Let it be closed to family and friends
Entertaining guests will be at the veranda

The explosion of bodies in hot passion is still not intimacy without truth
He could recognize the members of my body in the dark;
Be familiar with the turns, corners
Nooks, crannies, depths and heights of my body
We could surf through a tsunami with goose pimples as evidence
And still not achieve intimacy

My hunger for intimacy deepens
I search and find the one able
To hear my filthy and wretched truth
The one who sees past my truth
And introduced his truth which is grace
Alas, I give up my keys and let him in
I let out fires I shamefully quenched
The intimacy of truth cannot be afforded by humans
But the one already paid

– ChyD
© 2019

BEAUTY

Beauty.
There. The name I call you.
When I think of your romance.
The honey droppings you coo
Taking me to heights of pleasure.
Blissing me out.

Beauty.
The colour of pollen sprinkled
On the ovary of my mind.
When You sigh, when You speak.
Impregnating my soul with little You’s.
Birthing futures untold.

Beauty.
It’s the avatar of Your words
Taking shape, casting shadows
On the walls of my beating heart.
Making my petals into wings
Teaching butterflies in my tummy to dance.

Beauty.
From down in the brooks and rivers
All through the scrolls and letters
As the Great Nebuchadnezzer
Witnessed, No book had ever
Recorded Your fullness. Ever.

Beauty.
There. The name I call you.
When I remember Your intimidating love.
Of how Mighty You are in all things but one.
Your need and desire for me.
Beauty without Flaw.
My Yahweh.

Nonso John
© 2019

SUICIDE

I’ve written lots of things and deleted it,
I’m short of letters, talkless about words,
I’ve crumpled the pages of my notebooks,
written lots of doodles, smile at one minute,
And then cry at the next,
But now I’m just typing,

I smile at things that make me happy,
I frown at uncertainties,
Should I? Shouldn’t I? Can I? What if?
Questions…….
Afraid to take a decisive step,
I sit and sit,
Becoming a smiling mannequin,
For all and sundry,

I strive to make everyone smile,
All the time,
At the expense of my piece of mind,
Hey you, Be this……….
You there, Be that…….
Come on, I think you’re better this way……
On and on, they say,
Till my world spirals and gets sucked up in “voices”,

“Voices”,
Till I became dead to the VOICE,
Seriously, I can’t even hear HIM no more,
I’m at the end of the rope,
Teetering on the brink of sanity,
Toying with, no, relishing the thought of going over the edge,
Falling down, down, down and down,
Smiling at the very thought of it,
Dying,

Dying??
Why?
For whom?
To what end?
To punish who?
The voice said.
Myself, I reply.
Myself, for being a fool.
For hating myself.
For being a piece of dead leaf
Being tossed to and fro by the tumultuous wave.
For not loving myself., I answered,

And then what next, He asked?
That, I don’t have the answer to,
I’d be dead already,
Okay, you worthless piece,
Since that’s how you see yourself,
That’s what I’ll call you,
You were not put in the world to just breathe in its air,
Drink is water, eat it’s food, enjoy its holidays,
Spend its monies, and just give up like that,

You exist, you don’t just live,
Love yourself, not just others,
Don’t exchange peace of mind with piece of friends,
It ain’t worth it,
You are worth more,
Ah! So much more than rubies,
So much more than money,
Because of just one thing,
I love you!
So, get down from that cliff,
Sit down, breathe 3,2,1, there you are!
Stand up, dust your shoes,
The world is waiting for you!

Emenike Chinwendu

© 2018

AGAINST ALL ODDS

Since the days I learned to write my ABC’s I have always known that E effortlessly came before the Gs and Hs and with eyes like mocking jays’ ears I watched as this routine set to educate with Greek elements taught me that the Es Extraordinary will always exceed the N’s Normal that the best B-E-S-T only referred to people who constantly applied Basic Excellence to Supersede every Trial that dared believe possible is not a closed universal set with only such elements available but an ever growing individual set only bound by the extent to which we stretch so we stretch till our limits no longer exist we stretch till our breathes cease and we lay hold on eternity as we be physically transformed to who we truly are saints. We stretch cos we are sent.

So Hello Reality,

My name is Godswill Ezeonyeka and I have decided to not be bound by your rules. Trust me, it is not my intent to come off proud or maybe arrogant; but I just can’t fit into the boxes you house me in anymore. You claim the odds are against me that I can never beat this and fitting in seems the best option, but then I would be lost. So what sense does it make when the struggles of my life gets me fighting for my life? Do I live by the sword only to die by its side?

My name is Godswill Ezeonyeka; and don’t be mistaken, this is no identity crisis. I could join ISIS and show you how real this is but Christ is my Choice, it goes way deeper than what eyes see. This is my decision― to leave like Abraham, eat like Daniel, give like Solomon, to preach like Paul; to only appear normal yet be free so you can see that you’ve been barking up the wrong tree. I am certain you do not know who these people are because the last you heard from them is a letter like this as they dared realms unseen; stomping impossibilities. Their lives all but lost.

Yes― you can call me ‘Unreasonable’, but I make Reason able to find roots on solid― Word. God’s words. So I don’t make thoughts of the pains to come if I fail the shame and repercussions I dare to challenge for yet my rod will still stretch out above these waters, my knees will not yield your command, listen I skate on storms and though a giant may charge at me, you will not want to miss the next news headlines “greater is He that lives in me”.

My name is Godswill Ezeonyeka, and I am sorry― No― I do not agree that things go one way. That fate holds all cards to play. That I am helpless. Too many lies. Do you know who I am? The known world was called forth because of me, so don’t tell me of a ‘real world’, I decide which is real― the world my eyes see or the world I see in His eyes. I call the shots, Reality. You owe me, Reality; so pay attention.

My name is Godswill Ezeonyeka, and I may not be as brave, see this is not about a thorough plan. Your fire may burn me, my friends; the King may not stretch his sceptre for my safety, this boiling oil might be the last of me, these walls so thick may not give way to my victory still His faithfulness makes me faith-full ― Yes! No matter the stakes, I stay high on His intoxicating Word no matter what you bring my way, Reality. Hope you are still listening?

Cos I know for a certainty that aside fairy tales, animals can talk, water can stand tall as walls, the sun can take a pause on its journey and hungry lions can get selective with their lunch. Fire can defy the laws of gravity, a valley full of death can rise to become a mighty army and a man can with God as a son speak. So it doesn’t matter what you think, I just want you to know this much

I have chosen to right my perspectives; to redefine my reality

Like others…and others yet would, I have chosen Him over you and me.

I am broken from your rules.

In Jesus I live. True.

 

Yours sincerely…

 

By Ezeonyeka Godswill & Henry ‘Glofame’ Okoli

 

LOVE LETTERS

Ages ago on Calvary’s abode
On chiseled trees and rugged terrains
Between the cross and the shame
A cruci-fixion show to fix my soul
That my Saviour came all alone
From Glory to fill my dying soul
Changing charges for me in a death row
From negative to positive
Yet he went through the reverse horrible flow
Just for me to be saved
All because He loves me
Even more than He loves Himself

He became the first love letter
Written with His life and His blood as the ink
Being read with grace
And embraced by true believing hearts
For this His word says
That greater love has no man shown
That even while we were yet sinners
Christ came to die for us
Oh! what a bleeding love letter
Filled with mercy and tears
That looked beyond my weaknesses
And turned this Sinner into a Saint
And so we all are
Thanks to His work on Calvary’s cross

So what then?
I mean what next?
So a letter he became
Letters he made us as His aim
To carry His Kingdom and His name
Giving Him all the fame
In everything and everyday
Surrendering all to Him
In love like no child’s play
We are His letters of love
Written not on stony tablets
But on heart tablets
The ink being His life poured on us
Due to His Holy Spirit upon our lives
Through our redemption on Calvary’s cross

So let the world daily read
Not sin but holiness
Not lust but love
Not hatred but compassion
Not unforgiveness but forgiveness
Not lies but truth
Not evil but good
Not foolishness but wisdom
Not malice but forbearance
Not hypocrisy but sincerity
But above all
Let the world see Christ
Reigning In the midst our hearts
With “love works” at its peak
Extinguishing the flames of selfish deeds
“For Just as He is, so we are on Earth”

For we truly are letters of His love
An extention of His Kingdom on Earth
But just before I drop my pen
I will love to ask”How is your letter being read?”

By
Kenneth Ebisike
Official CAP Poet

*DIFFERENT*

bnmmmmmml

Decided finally, that against all odds I’d do what my heart tells me, and not what the world makes me

Indifferent I could pretend to be, but slowly it creeps to me

Friendly blows, leave cuts so deep

Frankly if it was easy I’d just walk away or sleep

Everything happens for a particular reason, so I look out to understand the season

Resentments and tension in the air, used to be all laughter a crushed funfair

Eventually I wouldn’t walk out of this one because it would soon become a character

Not everything happens because of me, won’t let my SOUL~JEY it leads to disaster

Totally sold out to the Almighty, giving Him totality.

 

# thatz just how to be DIFFERENT,. Remember the events that shape a man are not those that rub on him, but those that press hard and cut parts of his being#

by

Njoku Uchechi E.