“Unreserved; unrestrained

Your Love is wild, Your Love is wild for me.

It isn’t shy; it’s unashamed

Your love is proud, to be seen with me.

To be seen with me.

Cause you don’t give your heart in pieces [no no]

You don’t hide yourself to tease us.

 

Your love’s not fractured; it’s not a troubled mind

It isn’t anxious, it’s not the restless kind.

Your love’s not passive; it’s never disengaged

It’s always present, it hangs on every word you say.

Love keeps its promises

It keeps its word

Honors what’s sacred, cause its vows are good

Your love’s not broken, it’s not insecure

Your love’s not selfish, your love is pure”

               -Excerpt from song ‘Pieces’; Bethel music and Steffany Gretzinger.

Ever since I heard these lines for the first time, my heart hasn’t stopped humming along every day because these words mean more than the world to me.

Ever imagined a man who loves a woman (in his mind) but is not sure if he wants everyone to see them together, for reasons best known to him?

Or what about loving a woman so heart broken and battered at heart, a woman who has had her own share of disappointment in the ‘loving thing’?

I don’t know what you think about being in love with a man who isn’t proud to be seen with you, or a woman who only has a broken heart for you to love; for me, I personally do not want any of those ‘loving kind of things’.

One thing is certain for sure, you cannot enjoy love overdose from any these ‘loving people’- I think that I am hearing myself sound like my own Sophie Dawodu right now, LOL! Just go and see that ‘Shedding Skin’ video on the Christapoet YouTube channel (her lines always have a way of getting into my own pieces, LOL!

I don’t know if you have ever had to resist the temptations of constantly checking on the object of your love or even going as far as deleting their numbers for a while from your phone so you’d stop ‘obsessing’ over them; sometimes it could even be more frustrating especially when you find that your fingers can retrieve the numbers from your head when you are trying to do something ‘meaningful’ with your phone. So, one way or the other, the person will get you, get you…..LOL!

Some other times you might have determined in your heart, to intentionally not pick up your phone at least after one call from them gets missed, so that you can get them to ‘want more of you’ aka miss you, and call you more than they already do- after all, that was what your favorite love doctor recommended for you and all your fellow loving-struck people!

You know, a big part of my mind call those ‘loving stunts’, manipulations! They are selfish because they revolve on one’s own self and not even the so called ‘Beloved’.

Ama tell you two stories now, I hope you are not getting bored already. It is Favouromeje writing, okay? And she hardly knows how to write short because her words are just too many, okay? LOL.

Story 1

Jack and Jill have a thing for each other. I think it is a ‘loving thing’, and I also believe that it is a really strong thing too!

Jill loves Jack’s attention, especially the way he stares at her. Jack is kind to everyone and very particularly tender to Jill. Jack is also yet to say a thing to Jill.

One day, Jill wakes up thinking about Jack and she feels that a call would be all she needed to start a great day. So, she picks up her Nokia device and starts scrolling for Jack’s phone number. Seeing his name on her phone screen, her heart begins to pound really fast. Did I tell you that his voice which was very much richly deeper than a baritone, startles her in a pretty nice way and that the very air of his presence was the oxygen that she wanted more? Hmm!

She almost touches the green button of her Nokia mobile phone before she thinks to herself:

‘No, I called him yesterday evening already, I know he likes me a lot but I shouldn’t be calling him yet again’.

‘I just have to make him miss me plenty, so that he’d love me more and more. You know, I don’t have to be too cheap and easy to him’, she says dropping her phone for her writing pad to make her day’s to-do list. She promises herself a new pair of chinos pants, should incase she succeeds in pulling out her ‘loving thing no-calling stunts’ after 4 straight weeks. In fact she wrote her ‘loving thing’ project goal on her writing pad and stamped her decision on her journal.

She decides to intentionally miss calls at least once every other time he calls, so that he’d not feel that she Jill was that into him Jack!

Story 2

‘Bae and Boo like no other’, have a big thing for each other. I think it is a loving thing too, and I also must confess that they are both on a very long fine thing. I have been watching them with my pair of binoculars lately!

Bae loves Boo’s attention, especially the way he gets carried away staring her in the eyes. Bae thinks that the gaze from his very pair of eyes were stronger than laser.

Boo on the other hand, is good to all of them brothers and sisters, but speaking of them sisters, Bae is to Boo, his white rose among thorns. She was just it to him. In fact, I have personally noticed it myself because I am his sister too. ‘Bae and Boo like no other’ are loving strong but Boo is yet to spell it to Bae, and I think Bae is waiting too! Bae doesn’t mind waiting-loving for a thousand years because she likes her ‘loving things ‘slow, steady, non-intense, and building up like a crescendo.

One day, Bae thinks of Boo and decides to give him a call; if not for anything, she loves the startling effect of his better-than-a rich-baritone’s ‘hello’ over the phone.

So, she picks up her phone. I think it is also a Nokia mobile device like Jill’s. She does not have to scroll for his number for too long because ‘shamefully’, it is the very last number she dialed the night before. Bae knows that Boo would always be her favorite person in the whole world, and she in fact admits to herself that he is her most basic obsession, at least lately. In fact, I can personally tell you that Bae could run her airtime shamelessly for more than 30 minutes calling ‘MAN’ and this man is Boo!

Bae almost touches her Nokia green button but she refrains and says to herself:

‘I am a basic and a major distraction to this man and I don’t think that this is very good for him. I need to do him a favor and let him to just be, so that he can at least have enough time to be useful to himself’

‘Besides, I know that I am who he needs but this can never be good for him, at least not for his ‘male-getting-happiness from-a good hunting’ mind’. This she says out loud, dropping her phone for her writing pad. She needs to make her to-do list which she couldn’t

write the night before as she ritually did.

You might want to count and compare the number of ‘I’ and ‘Me’ or ‘he’ and ‘him’ in Jill’s and Bae’s musings. You might find out who was ‘loving selfish’ and who actually was loving. Love can never revolve around the subject but the object and that is just Jesus loves.

I think that Bae is a little more like my Abba Daddy than Jill.

Abba Daddy is too love secure to manipulate me by teasing me with his presence. He doesn’t have to manipulate me with punishments or fear of hell in order to get me on His side. He loves so wild, so unreserved, so unrestrained and I know that He loves me pieces without any heart in pieces. He is not using His death on the cross to play any mind games on me like many people might want to think that he does. His ‘Loving thing’ is whole and complete, actively loving me and engaged daily with His commitment to me, His commitment to come back for me.

It is the knowledge of my ‘Crazy in love-with me- Father’ that gives me the boldness to pour my love on anybody I want to, even if he has to be ‘MAN’ because I know that my Abba Daddy’s love has made me too invincible to be insecure and broken!

By Favouromeje, February, 2017.