How’s a life possibly turned inside out without touching it?
The feel tells us neurons are dying off, sense surfaces growing numb
There’s an exterior of sparrows cared for, plus plaques for fighting for top spot
Lots of them, lots of birds flying away
Dying embers, remember the ignition
The spark that started our living joyfully, dying selflessly
Today, its running really fast, the engine’s powering past the sixth mile mark
Change the stripes on that signpost, make it ‘feet’, fittingly, end-stone-post
truly, the birds are gone now, its just a silent owl howl, a ringing hark back

This morning, I saw my life again, in the mirror with black patched under-eyes
Old, renewed angst, plans slammed to pieces by own hands, lone stands
My failure, I wail, is me, me, yes me in the mirror, no other, infinite bother
I fall with abandon under its torture, it takes my mind, makes me bear it, do its bidding
Bow, cower, lose my sanity, my grip, even as my phalanges lock ever more tightly
I’m me, I’m fear-formed, fall-prone, done for
Dusk comes, sees me weeping under that neem tree, over meanly meted defeat
I fight to be me, so it means I’m still bound
Burden, oh burden, what burden drags my soul upon, yes, against thorns and thistles
To pierce and tear me apart, to leave me eternally distraught!

Finished, I leave my self for dead
Its the only way to be free from destructive weight
I resign to life, I put down the self centered sack slung across my back
A cross, not my type, but truly radical a cure
The price for freedom mine to take
To be in awe of, enthralled by, taken into, illuminated
Live out
The new burden, the one I now actively fall in love with.


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