Tag: searching

WHERE THE TRUE CONFIDENCE LIES

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I’ve been lost in search

On every door with ‘EXIT’
Crest I looked and I
Was reminded I’ve been
There too.

I’ve been lost in search

I tried so many CODES
Just to see if I could the
Mystery CODE decode

But yet again I stood fixed
Face to face with crazy oppositions
With both my hands forming a
Fist and I would ask who do I
Meet?

For an answer so delicate
As where true confidence
Lies I rummaged through
All possible lockers
In search for an express answer
Only to be yet again confronted
By the puckered face of
IMPOSSIBILITY

Some crazy tales from
A blabbing old man who
Once sought similar answers
Only to be left with nothing
repeatedly  buzzed
Around my ears like a busy bee
It wouldn’t let me be


I wouldn’t have any of it
My search took a drastic
Turn away from the
Populace to face
The man with the QUEST
Now I ain’t asking anyone
But me and truly I found
An answer.

Though it took me a
While but then I still
Got a befitting reply
That true confidence
Can only be found in
GOD.

Ebubechi
© 2023

Inner strength

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The task is enormous like Mount Horeb
But the strength inside is small

Looking for strength for the task
Searching for strength for the mission

Stumbled at a gym center
Thinking with it I will gather strength I need for the task

But that only helped to build my physical muscle for bodily profit

Went to the rich and highly placed for strength
But feebleness is what characterized them

A voice came and said, “I am the strength you need.”
Heh! “Strength is now a person not a feeling or force”, said my soul.

A brother also confirmed once that, “he can do all things through this personality who strengthens him.”

My strength must be Jesus Christ, Him alone the very strength I need to move mountains and subdue the earth.

Brightobong
©2021

Power

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I pick my words carefully,
Just like picking white beans amidst the brown

I search for my words carefully,
Just like searching for diamonds in the mud

For words can hurt and draw some hate
Words can destroy and finely create

Words can bring life and can bring death
Words can bring courage and can bring fret

Words fire faster than the ‘bullet full gun‘,
Can murder the next man with a bulletproof vest

My tongue is an organ full of ferocious words,
Always ready to unleash terrifying thorns

Like a sword it can slice, divide and tear down
At times i wonder if this red demon can be dismantled, restructured, redesigned, painted with grace and seasoned with salt to speak positively

I’ve come to realize that whatever I say can become a self fulfilling prophecy
My words can either lift me or drift me,
Raise me or erase me,

Words can liberate and can oppress
They can cause to blossom and can suppress

My words are the most powerful weapons that I posses
My word is power!

Princess Pirinye
©2020

Fear

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Today, I am not going to be defining fear
Because definitions differ to people who face it.
Don’t bother searching for the five tips that would help you overcome;
I didn’t think enough to put them here.

I will like to ask;
Why do you fear?
What exactly is it that makes you uncertain even when you dare?
Do they exist or do they not?

You see, oftentimes we’ve treated fear like an illusion.
But how come it hurts us so deeply and leaves marks inscribed to our hearts?
How is it possible that what we can’t see, touch, hear or smell;
Cause a lot of damage and dismay?

Is it fear that makes us tear;
Do we pretend and lace-up hope?
Isn’t it hard to mention faith;
When you feel you may not overcome?

Own it. Live it. Because it’s here.
In this world, it may not breathe but it lives;
It eats and drinks and speaks to you;
‘You are nothing’, it says; ‘you can’t make it’, it whispers.

Just like fiction, it occurs not just in your imagination but from you, when you stutter we can tell;
It acts as the director try to make you play every scene to its taste;
It ridicules you when you try it your own way and fail;
It provides glasses to help you look at the world from its perspective.

Though you may see giants;
Feel powerless, not certain, still doubting;
Although it’s true it makes you feel worthless and no substance of a thing hoped for;
Can polish your faith to make you see any evidence of a thing not seen;
But it’s up to you to take a stand when you want to.
Because in reality, we all face fears
But the ability to face your fears is what makes the difference.

And I close with this;
Yes, your fears exist;
But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t
Take a leap of faith to succeed.

Adedatryts
© 2019

A Letter To My Friend Seeking

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Dear Ijay, 

I am a firm believer in the need for people to unravel themselves. And this is true of every sincere person I have known.

We all get to a point where we pull things apart, sometimes by accident. In our soul and mind, bit by bit we spread all our pieces in a bid to know ourselves, to understand the ‘why’s’ without any demanding interference and this is good.

This sort of chaos unfolding is common when you have been stifled all your life. You are longing to know  – ‘Is my life being defined by what I have been conditioned to be?’, ‘Who am I really when no one is pushing me?’. So somewhere in the midst of this ruckus there arises a suffocating need to either free and continue to conform or be free and allow yourself transform, into who you truly are.

I have had to unravel this scroll of a life for myself too and I am still unravelling. Like the best kind of book with a climax and downfall every good story should have, I have gasped, laughed out loud, I’ve been shocked out of my wits!, bawled in frustration, been enveloped in cruel drowning silence. I have screamed loud enough for the quantum world to hear (into my pillow that is) and breathe a sigh of relief with my salt stained face. I have found my unfolding to be painfully beautiful in its honestly true and  deepest form.

Ijay, permit me to share with you what I have learned.

It was never my conditions that defined me, it was always who I chose to be, freedom isn’t free. After all said and done, constraint still posed an essential companion.

Knowledge begets responsibility and where knowledge is a full head, responsibility is an understanding heart that knows when and how to act.

There are truths that resonate within this stubborn blood and bone I peel away from my soul day by day. It is beyond social conditioning, unravelling this way brings me face to face with the perfection of intricate and carefully thought out design. I did not just fall out of the sky neither am I a mere miracle of Oduduwa in the sense of a tale. No.

I was formed from a spark of light in the dark watery depths of my mothers womb, where egg and sperm collide. This effect must have a cause, my perfect design daily combated by jealous imperfection screams of a perfectly covert designer.

It is why no matter how much I call myself god I have never been able to spell it with a big G. or have you?

I could never lie to the multiple layers of prickly cells underneath my skin. something of a truth has been weaved into my DNA. I cannot deny me and with this singular act of adrenal rebellion, I have learned the touch of peace.

It is cool and calm but it does not always put us at ease. When things started to change inside me, the world around seemed to align accordingly. If my heart hated it then I didn’t want it and there went my taste for addiction.

My Dear Friend, do not ever let anything stop you from unravelling. It is a necessary piece in this puzzle called life. There will be beauty and pains, you must experience fully. Unravel without the biases, without the trends, pay no mind to the hype elaborately expressed beliefs of  people (especially on social media).

Listen to the dirges of your body, those dreary songs that beg for more and lead to no end. Drown them out by listening more to the yearnings of your heart. Learn to sit on the ground, legs curled up beneath your core as you separate truth from the lies, the feelings from the facts, the assumptions from whats real. Don’t ever be afraid of this process, all of creation is on your side.

Soon you will cease to be ashamed of being naked, alone at 3am in front of the mirror. You will learn to say sweet things into your eyes because you know there is someone beautiful within, who is desperate to meet you.

In all of this Ijay,

I pray you fall. Deeply in love with the process of seeking and finding.

I pray you fly. Far above the noise of the earth.

I pray you’re unafraid. Of knowing you have a beginning and an end and maybe your end is endless.

And  if you find that you are eternal, know that it is okay to be all this and Forever.

 

With all of Heavens Love,

Msray