CHRONICLES OF A DROWNING MIND

Dead zone
Broken soul
Scary shadows
Those are rhythms of a poor old kid
Whose ways never pleased anyone, not even herself.

No hope
Buried grace
Weak for the race
Those are top list words recorded in the word billboard of her mind
She used to be of the royal line
But now goodness turned to lime
She sees God’s intentions as the least
Her faith so rusty and loosen like an abandoned screw
There she becomes a beast that feast with the devil.

Records of heart failures
Impotent to believe the best inside
Drenched with the thoughts of discovery
Draining in the memory lane of no understanding
Tears from the sole of the heart dripping down like flood yet none sees these flood of questions buried in tears

Travelling alone in travail… I weep in smiles…
Because in my green days have I grown grey because am yet to discover the me in me

In silenced smiles I’m drown in fears because my mind has become aged in thoughts

Hold my weeping mind
Embrace my tears in warmth,
Caress me with words of rescue
Carry me in the wings of warmth understanding
For I drown in silence

Oh…save me from this destiny device
For I transit into the groove of eternity
My powerhouse drowns
I plead for restoration if that exist
I seek for redemption for this battle is beyond me

Nonye
The Alchemist
© 2019

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Questions Crossed Out

My wailing,
What does it weigh,
Against the sighs of seven billion souls, each,
Digging wounds into my already shattered depths,

My breathing,
What does it matter,
When it’s lost in waves of first winds drawn and last gasps sown,
Lashing earth for eons,

My living,
Is it a rare gem or a speck of dust,
Amongst countless weddings, empires collapsing,
And the universe’s billionth galaxy collision,

The answer,
Is a death to cross these questions out,
The meaning of existence, hanging on a stake,
For my sake.

Ikenna Nwachukwu
© 2018

SUICIDE

I’ve written lots of things and deleted it,
I’m short of letters, talkless about words,
I’ve crumpled the pages of my notebooks,
written lots of doodles, smile at one minute,
And then cry at the next,
But now I’m just typing,

I smile at things that make me happy,
I frown at uncertainties,
Should I? Shouldn’t I? Can I? What if?
Questions…….
Afraid to take a decisive step,
I sit and sit,
Becoming a smiling mannequin,
For all and sundry,

I strive to make everyone smile,
All the time,
At the expense of my piece of mind,
Hey you, Be this……….
You there, Be that…….
Come on, I think you’re better this way……
On and on, they say,
Till my world spirals and gets sucked up in “voices”,

“Voices”,
Till I became dead to the VOICE,
Seriously, I can’t even hear HIM no more,
I’m at the end of the rope,
Teetering on the brink of sanity,
Toying with, no, relishing the thought of going over the edge,
Falling down, down, down and down,
Smiling at the very thought of it,
Dying,

Dying??
Why?
For whom?
To what end?
To punish who?
The voice said.
Myself, I reply.
Myself, for being a fool.
For hating myself.
For being a piece of dead leaf
Being tossed to and fro by the tumultuous wave.
For not loving myself., I answered,

And then what next, He asked?
That, I don’t have the answer to,
I’d be dead already,
Okay, you worthless piece,
Since that’s how you see yourself,
That’s what I’ll call you,
You were not put in the world to just breathe in its air,
Drink is water, eat it’s food, enjoy its holidays,
Spend its monies, and just give up like that,

You exist, you don’t just live,
Love yourself, not just others,
Don’t exchange peace of mind with piece of friends,
It ain’t worth it,
You are worth more,
Ah! So much more than rubies,
So much more than money,
Because of just one thing,
I love you!
So, get down from that cliff,
Sit down, breathe 3,2,1, there you are!
Stand up, dust your shoes,
The world is waiting for you!

Emenike Chinwendu

© 2018

EVERYDAYJESUS clears contradictions! (A review)

Let’s study a bit

Take what we have known and put them in perspective of the whole bible and see what we find…

Let’s start from the beginning.

And when I say ‘beginning’ I mean Genesis.

Let’s start from ‘Moses’

There are thoughts which should have come to your mind if you read the bible and if they haven’t, let me bring them.

Moses was born in Exodus 2.

But he wrote the book of Genesis?

You would be careful in reading the things that he wrote happened before Abraham and especially before NOAH.

Then we think most of the things he wrote were by inspiration and he wrote to his understanding… We believe Moses wrote Genesis to Deuteronomy but I saw Deuteronomy 34:5-6  
5 …Moses the servant of the Lord died there in the land of Moab, according to the word of the Lord. 

  1. And he buried him in a valley in the land of Moab…

Was that by inspiration too? 

The only explanation is that someone else wrote that Book. But then, studies in the Old Testament show us that other parts of the Torah or Pentateuch are stylistically inconsistent. For example, have you noticed that there are two creation accounts? And they are not like the accounts of the gospels. The gospels as you know, even with differences, often say the same thing. So while in Mark, Jesus could do no mighty works in a certain place, in Matthew Jesus could also do no mighty works in the same place.  
But in Genesis, we see God makes male and female in Chapter 1 but makes a male alone at first in Chapter 2 before a woman. Jesus even quotes this passage Matthew 19 and Mark 10. If Moses was operating under inspiration, would the inspirer contradict himself or would Moses, writing, not notice his own inconsistencies?  

Yet for me the most compelling proof against the authorship of Moses is the fact that the Pentateuch is written in Third person. Why would I refer to myself in third person when writing about myself?  

Other examples can be found in Amos, Hosea and Isaiah (amongst others) of prophets whose ministry was documented by other people. It doesn’t reduce the authenticity or audacity of the books or the prophets. Ezekiel is the only Major Prophet that wrote by himself, and it can be seen in his style. He writes in first person perspective. It’s very simple.  

Now, a lot of Christians believe the curse at the end of Revelation will apply to them if they dare think through scripture like this. So they’d rather let some pastor take the blame while they blindly follow him. It’s OK…  

However, the curse in Revelation can only apply to the book of Revelation since the Bible was not compiled by then. With knowledge like this, we can better understand the anachronisms and variations in the Pentateuch.   

In Mark 5, Jesus says Moses was talking about him; that is to say, Moses is reported as saying things which actually were about him, Jesus.   

Study for yourself… Dig into the Old Testament… Because EVERDAYJESUS is our clarity too. 

Review by Daniel, Achikanu (December, 2016).      

Questions for the atheist…

The-Thinker

How do you do it?
When the sky is dark
And the storm is harsh
When your spirit is down
And your heart is heavy
When vicissitudes are much
And your ups are downs

How do you do it?
When the sound of music
Holds no worship
Devoid of passion
Have you ever felt it
Sobs of songs
Sobs of passion
Where do you turn to?
When you can’t go on
The odds are against you
The future looks bleak
When death strikes
And your confidant is gone

What do you hang on to?
Your eternity holds no hope
Just space
How do you do it?
Thinking you evolved
Such a pity
No gratefulness

What gives you joy?
Sighting the green trees and their lush fruits
the sea and the blue skies
the rain and the sun
And there is no omnipotence

How do you know it?
The larger than life itself
The uncertainties and mishaps
Hanging by a thread
When money can’t help
And love isn’t the answer

What do you do?
Is it worth it?
Being logical and calculative
When your burdens can be cast
And your heart can be peaceful
Be stupid and happy
Not logical and blue.

-Chidimma Nnagbo

wHaat IF?

What if this life you’re living is just one long dream?
What if there’s no life at all?
What if the Universe was created from one BIG BANG?
What if man actually evolved from water?
What if we’re actually not living on planet Earth?
What if there’s no Solar system?
What if you’re not grown up?
What if you’ve not been born at all?
What if there’s no such thing as death?
What if all religion is false?
What if Jesus was never born, hence He never died?
What if there’s no Heaven or Hell?
What if there’s no judgement after death?
What if rapture was all a hoax?
What if the Bible is false?
What if there is no God?
But wait!!!
What if all these are just crazy thoughts running through my mind?

Now…

What if you’re truly living?
What if the story of evolution was all… Ya, we all know it’s definitely false
What if there’s a God and He did create the Universe?
What if there’s a Heaven and a Hell?
What if there’s actually judgment after death?
What if rapture is actually gonna happen?
What if the story of Jesus is SOLID?
What if the Bible is 100% true?
What if you died without believing in Jesus, what would that mean?
What if you give your life over to Jesus now?
Wouldn’t you feel a whole lot safer?
Knowing that if He’s real, you make Heaven
“And if He’s not?” you ask
You still loose nothing
It’s a “win-win” situation if you ask me
There’s no harm in trying, only joy, happiness and definitely a sense of security
He’s waiting on you
Take that step today
God bless you

-Godwin Chibueze